My mom truly is a lost artist. She always talks about the time she wanted to go to art school and my grandfather didn�t let her. Of course she never heard from him you can�t go. But my grandma had told her to not even talk about it in front of him, because there was no chance that he�d let it happen.

After marriage once my father who knew about that, bought color pencils for her, but my grandma took them away and said, you know you are a wife now, and this is your job. Don�t talk about painting in front of your husband again. you know men, they just want a good wife.
My grandma wasn�t a cruel or strict woman at all, she was just under the influence of patriarchal culture too much. I wish she was alive now so I�d ask her; did you ever think about what your daughter as a human being wants? Did you ever ask yourself why you are always thinking of what men want, like a programmed machine and never thought about yourself and your two daughters� dreams and wishes?

Anyhow, she was totally successful to get her daughter out of the dream she always had.. poor girl. I wish I was her mom (actually sometimes I think like I am).

I always wished she�d started getting painting lessons, even I tried to teach her but she never got into it like the past.

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What a great person. Such a huge loss indeed.

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it�s important for me to remember every painting has been worked on while listening to which song.
I painted �not yet� with fragile (sting). Those days I was making the decision for coming to India. I had serious hesitations and great fears. My mom I think is the most patient person in the world, because at least hundred times I listen to the song until the work was finished..
some times I think this is crazy. with a friend once I was talking about something, I don�t remember what it was about but we were totally disagreed with each other. Suddenly he said �you know what? I don�t expect more from you. you�re an artist after all, all you guys are useless..� :))that was the funniest thing someone�s ever told me in an argue..


and there is something about landscape paintings that I think is very important. we always look it down, especially to show that we admire thoughtful artworks.

I did this painting to practice the skill of making a nature sight with oil, and I won�t deny that I really enjoyed it.
After it was finished, I realized there is something in this type of artworks that can make them valuable, and that is the union of items while observing it closely and their distinction from the distance. This is the characteristic of Renaissance paintings and Davinci was the best in it.

It�s not like you can only do this with landscapes, but it�s awesome for practice that.

Definitely I�ll do more landscapes in the future. And I won�t think like I�m doing something invaluable.
Somehow when I compare myself now with the first years in art school I�m like �get down walk with me lady!� like iraninans say to someone with windily attitude.

Painting: Koregan�s February; oil on canvas; 75x50 cm; june 2006.